God had started to change me and I was thankful for that. However, I had to make some changes and stop some things I had been doing up to that point. Feelings change for a lot of things when God gets a hold of you. Things such as your spiritual life. I found myself spending a lot of time in prayer more so than any one point in my life. Was it because I had been in jail? No.. Was it because I was scared I would go back to jail? No.. It was because these were changes the Lord had directed me to make.
Upon getting picked up by my dad, I stayed at his house. I had to go back to our house to pick up clothes and other belongings. That was tough as I didn't know if I would ever be returning to live there again. I figured most likely not. At this point I had no idea what my future was. All I knew is that God was finally in control and I had to trust him for what was about to come my way. The unknown is a very scary thing. Putting everything you have in the Lord to take care of it is hard to do. I found myself completely surrendering to the Lord everything. In my eyes it was the only choice I had and the only choice I wanted.
In the next few days, I found myself growing closer to the Lord. I had shed the affair and the person that was associated with that affair. I started to have my devotions daily and spent time in scripture. I developed a new way of living life. The time I was spending in prayer was not only for the situation that I had found myself in, but I started praying for others as well. Prayer didn't need to be just about my needs, but about others as well. God had opened my eyes to that and so I started praying for others as well. The best part about that is seeing prayer answered. For so long I had only come to God for the big things and didn't think praying for the small things mattered all that much. I was wrong. Yes I know hard to believe even though I basically had no interest in serving the Lord unless it benefited me.
Another thing that I had to change was the truth in my life. Up until this point, I had no truth in my life. I had been living a lie for so long. The only truth if there WAS one, was selfishness. When God had changed me, thinking of others was a whole new thing. I had to stop putting myself first in every one of my thoughts. How this or that would benefit me. Coming to the realization of how selfish of a person I had become was a very tough reality.
In the amount of about 24 hours, God had started to radically change my life. God was cleaning out areas that were restricted to everyone except for me. Not only did I have to open those areas up to God, but I had to start allowing others access to those areas as well. I will continue this subject tomorrow.
What to pray for.... Pray for us as we still are needing to make a decision about a few things. Pray for the Lord's will in our life. My wife will be going once again to try to help out legal situation along. Pray for my kids as we are still seeing some adjustment issues. Pray for a job for my wife. A new one, pray for a very special person in our lives. That is all I can say right now.
Father thank you for change. Thank you for transformation. Thank you Father for saving me.