Wednesday, May 16, 2012

A glass house marriage...

For those of you who will read this blog in the future, you may understand what the title of this blog means. Living in a glass house on a golf course is not an ideal for any homeowner who makes the unwise choice of either building or buying a glass house... Think about it, golf balls are going to come flying onto your property and near your house because every golfer out there has an errant shot that goes some other course than what was intended.

My marriage is a glass house. It is a glass house because I ripped any protective layers off of it when I had the affair. At any moment something could come crashing through and put a hole in something that my wife and I are trying to build again. As the offending spouse, there are moments that I very carefully have to choose my words or my actions. If I choose a word wrong, or an action wrong, I am now that errant golf shot heading toward my glass house. Depending on how non smart I am depends on if I break the glass or crack it. Trust me I do fail sometimes.

I guess my point here is that building a new marriage or rebuilding a marriage, everything has to be better than it was before. There are moments that you just have to get through and make better than the previous moments. I could easily say that my wife and I are in a season of moments where before there were lots of bad memories that trigger fears and anxieties. For instance, yesterday I just really beat up on myself all the trouble I had caused and all the stuff I put my wife through. This was all day yesterday. The best medicine was coming home and getting a hug from my wife. It was a nice long one at that. I told her once again I was sorry. I really wanted her to know how much I loved her.

I find the more we go on and the moments that we get past and change, it makes the glass turn into something that can withstand a pounding. Our glass house marriage starts to turn into a solid house more and more. The glass pieces/moments get replaced with protective covering for the house. More and more the glass marriage starts to look like a real marriage based on love, centered around Christ, and meant to last forever.

Honestly, there is no set time as to when that glass marriage turns to a real marriage, but once it does the point is to keep it that way and continue to make it stronger. They used to say "they don't build like they used too" well I think it is true of marriages as well. My wife and I are determined for that to be said about our marriage. I will tell you this, I can say that about my wife. There is no one who is more amazing, stronger, loving, and giving than she is. I will say it again... I truly don't deserve her, but I am blessed and I will continue to build the marriage with her into something amazing so that one day, friends and family can look at us and say "they don't build like they used too"...

OK so what to pray for... Pray for us this weekend traveling. Pray for my oldest son. His behavior is improving, but we still need your prayers for him. Pray for my mom's healing. Pray for the Lord's will in our lives and BOTH of our job situations.

Father thank you being our center...